Teacher Transcendence

So everyone has had a bad class, right? You don't even have to be a teacher to have had one. You could be a student and realize that one of your classmates is sending your teacher through...you know what I mean.

Well, today I had one of those classes. I can't say that this is the best time in my life. Last night, Kody almost missed the bus that got him to Kobe where an angel had to help direct him to the correct trains so he could get to the airport on time to catch his flight. Thank the Lord for young Japanese people who want to speak English and/or help foreigners. Also, it's freezing. I'm exhausted; I haven't had a weekend sleep-in day for a while AND I'm looking towards two 9-6 rehearsals this weekend in a far away town where I'll only be utilized for 1 hour. For 20 minutes, I'm a star. Those 20 minutes cost a lot. Yay female parts. Anyway, I'm overwhelmed. But today, I can happily say, I transcended my circumstances.

I think there is a fine line between not caring about your class and not caring about your students. The first means that you don't get your feelings hurt everytime things don't go as planned. The second means you just don't care at all. I'm attempting to master the first without inadvertantly falling into the second. Ichi-D, ichinensei, is probably the WORST first grade class. There is a bank of 4 troublemakers that sit on the far left and a bank of 2 or 3 lesser trouble makers that sit on the right. Up until this point, I've been a bit shy to these students. It takes a lot of ego to go into that classroom with gusto. But today, I threw everything out the window. I've learned that drawing attention to students - not in a negative way, I'm almost incapable of scolding them - does loads for their participation. I FORCE them to participate. So today, instead of avoiding the trouble-makers, I sought them out. I walked up to 13 year old boys that were writing 'I love play sex' on their papers and asked them if they liked playing baseball.

The class didn't go very well. It took forever to get them to do the first activity which entailed writing two past tense sentences on a piece of paper folded in four. I studied English. I played the piano. This is easy stuff. Even for 13 year old Japanese kids. If all else failed all they had to do was copy two of the 10 sentences I'd written on the board. The teacher and I forewent the last activity, which was playing a dice game with a neat little gameboard because there were only 7 minutes left in class after the other activities. We played tic tac toe instead. It wasn't ideal, but we managed.

Now, I feel great. It's absurd. I came back to my email and started a log to keep track of my classes. I gave 1D a horrible review and now I'm writing this peppy blog. It's a bad class. That's all there is to it. It's not me. It's not the host of other 27 students that did a great job today. It's 6 or 7 puny 13-year-old brats who don't know their left hand from their right. I'm okay with that.

One of my favorite things about this job is that I'm learning to go with it, to create lessons on the fly (still working on this), to be unquenchably resourceful and resilient. These things take self-confidence and poise.

I can't believe it. Japanese junior high school boys are going to shape my character. I never dreamed I could learn from someone who carved 'sex' into their classroom wall.

Paradox

A Royal Caribbean cruise ship docks in the north of Haiti. Passengers feel “disturbed.” They think there is something, hmm, shall we say coldhearted about their enjoying pina coladas on the beach when they know that less than 100 miles away, people are trapped in rubble and having appendages amputated. The big wig of Royal Caribbean responds on their website. He says they bring much needed economic perks to the region and are helping deliver supplies to the victims.

I found this article interesting because it highlights the paradox that is western affluence. Hearing about the horrors in Haiti one isn’t sure whether to feel guilty or blessed. Are we lucky that this hasn’t happened to us, or should we feel guilty that we live in a country that isn’t already ravaged by hunger and is large enough that when disaster strikes, help is close at hand? Though, I’m sure the victims of hurricane Katrina didn’t feel guilty for living in the U.S.

I’m prone to agree with the Royal Caribbean big wig. Americans aren’t going to stop taking vacations just because there’s a horrible disaster in Haiti, but they WILL feel squeamish about seeing their own decadence in light of such a disaster. If the cruise line docked anywhere else, it wouldn’t change the fact that the passengers were having a lovely vacation while people were dying – not so very far away. And if the ship is indeed bringing needed supplies to the region it seems like the right decision, though not so popular a decision, for the company to make.

I’m having difficulty categorizing the passengers’ responses, however. Do I look upon them with disgust, attributing their own “disturbed” feeling to a desire to remain oblivious to what’s happening rather than facing it for what it is? Or should I view it as a natural human reaction to inequality? Much like healthy human beings should be appalled by the horrific violence of the holocaust?

I woke up a couple mornings ago with an overwhelming feeling of luck, or good karma, or something. As I rode my bicycle to school, I thought about how blessed/lucky I was. Jesus said not to be astounded by bad things happening in the world, but rather to be astounded by the fact that they haven’t happened to you. I still haven’t figured out why he said this, but that’s no surprise. When I’m home, I live in one of the most advanced countries in the world. Even in Japan, I live in such a country. Good grief, they have iPods, KFC, and fiber optic internet here. I have a place to live, a job, an education, a bicycle (;P), and plenty to eat. I have 2 coats. I have so much family, it would be very difficult to ever be homeless. It’s so good, it’s “disturbing.”

But maybe Jesus said that because it’s not about where you live or who you were born to be. In the flash of a bomb, all of this could change. It wouldn’t even take that, actually. A car accident could turn my world upside down. So maybe it is a matter of feeling blessed, thankful, and aware. Aware that life is something to be enjoyed for today.